HomeStudy: Our Experience

by Mark & Kym Wright

When we were faced with adopting Morgan, I was concerned about the homestudy. I already had six children, and wasn't sure what this process would involve. Were they trying to find a way to prove that I was unfit to care for another child? Were they going to look in my closets to determine my organizational skills (or lack thereof)? How about the dirt under my children's fingernails? Also, it was inconvenient to drive the better part of an hour to the adoption agency's office several times for the necessary interviews. We used a Christian adoption agency for our homestudy.

My fears proved to be unfounded, and the inconvenience just that: a minor roadblock. One of the worst parts of the process was having to read and give a summary of two books relevant to adoption and child-raising. (I guess taking Clay and Dee's child-training seminar five times over the years wasn't enough!) Two book reports were required from each of us. I had to help my husband through this procedure by reading portions of the book to him, and assisting him in wording the reiterations. The focus of the homestudy is for the social worker to find reasons that the couple is capable and able to care for a child, or another child. We found it best to help her find these reasons. To point out the good things, to show our virtuous intentions and exemplary parenting skills; to work with her in finding positive characteristics, qualities, and capabilities that would encourage a judge to want to place this child with us. When the case worker was coming to our home, we scrubbed, washed windows, put on clean clothes, and my country-bumpkin children had to wear shoes at home! However, the case worker's main concern was to make sure that we had enough physical space for the child to sleep and put his/her clothes and belongings. Our social worker was very encouraging and bolstered my lagging confidence by telling me that there was never any question from the start as to placing the child in our home. They nearly begged me to take him home from the hospital, so he wouldn't have to spend time in a foster home. Not to worry. I knew that once I saw him, and the papers were signed, they couldn't keep him from me! Though the birthmother's rights were terminated after twenty-four hours (State requirement), he was not legally ours for another six months. Scott, our lawyer, obtained legal guardianship, which he turned over to us until the final hearing. There was an awkward feeling that, until final judgment, Morgan could be taken from us. But, we had to live as if that weren't going to happen, which in fact it didn't. Scott put it into perspective for us by saying that we had to remember this child would always have two mothers and two fathers. Though he became mine (in my heart) months before his birth, as soon as the agreement was made that we would adopt him, the final hearing brought great rejoicing and the lifting of a heavy unseen burden.

So, if you are thinking about adopting a baby or a child, don't let the homestudy stop you. As Scott said, it is just a small bother that leads to that bundle of joy becoming yours. Remember God's words to Joshua: "Be bold, banish fear and doubt, remember the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." (Joshua 1:9)